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Textiles and text
This series of works is created using only
needles, threads, and fabric. The artist believes that needlework
is a very feminine means of expression, because in the past,
Chinese women were not allowed to use paper and pens. Their art
was expressed through embroidery, and creating art with needles
and thread is a feminine tradition.
As a child, the artist
watched her grandmother do needlework beside her. She was
oppressed her whole life and was not allowed to read, write, or
paint. But while embroidering, she still expressed her love for
the world with flowers and animals. However, after the cloth was
stitched many times, it produced a kind of morbid protuberance.
The artist feels that it is similar to a scar, which is the
embodiment of memory in the flesh.
Some of the scars selected
in the work come from the artist herself, and some come from those
around her. These scars are always associated with childbirth,
illness, and puberty. Behind each scar embroidery is a
corresponding experience that is important to her. By placing the
work together with the story behind it, she shows her personal
history and some of her thoughts to others in this way.
Text:
1. Two months before I took the college entrance exam, my father
was preparing for heart surgery in the hospital, the second
surgery of his life. During this time, the pressure of my studies
left me no time to take care of him. I wanted to go to the
hospital to visit, but I was never able to prepare myself to face
a seriously ill relative. My actions were interpreted as a lack of
filial piety, and my mother severely scolded me. But I also
couldn't understand why I couldn't do it.•I may never know just
how dangerous this operation was. I can't know how my parents felt
while they were waiting for the operation. I just remember my
mother saying that when my father knew he had to have this
operation, he held her hand every night when they went to bed for
fear.•However, my father's pain and fear also affected me, as I
was alone preparing for the college entrance exam. I was also
suffering from a relationship setback. When I tried to put one
foot out the window, my inner illness was perhaps no less severe
than my father's. I was probably experiencing the most difficult
moment to date.•After I finished my college entrance exams, I also
received the news that the surgery was successful. Both events had
a relatively satisfactory ending, but the scars on the body will
never disappear, and neither will the memory.
2. I have scars on my left arm from cuts of various sizes. I first
cut myself when I was 14 years old. I don't really remember why I
did it, and the reasons for each cut were different. But generally
speaking, I was pushed too hard, and I had no outlet for my
emotions. I could only turn back on myself in various
ways.•Although I haven't done this for many years, the scars are
still visible. When someone notices them and asks me questions,
especially children, I say I was scratched by a cat.
3. In 2016, my father underwent his first operation, a leg
operation, because a tumour had grown on his knee. I was in junior
high school at the time.•This tumour was the direct cause of my
father's serious psychological problems. He was diagnosed with
depression. Every morning, he would cry bitterly because he had
been unable to sleep the night before. Whenever this happened, I
would feel so scared that I would not dare to leave my room and
see my father. My brother, however, could naturally go over and
comfort him, but I could not do this. I never understood
why.•Because I was afraid to face my father, I can barely remember
what his face looked like, what his state was like, or what he
said during that time. But every summer, I can see this scar on
his leg.•In 2022, I finally returned home from school because of
depression. My father comforted me and told me not to worry.•On 16
December 2024, my father said that he has been suffering from
severe depression and anxiety recently, and I told him to go out
and get some sun.
4. In 2018, my aunt gave birth to another child, her second child,
who, like her first child, was a boy.After the baby was born, I
heard her tell me herself that she felt depressed. I watched her
give up her life again and distance herself from her friends.Every
time relatives at home talked about her children, they would say
with a bit of schadenfreude, ‘Another boy. These two boys are
going to cost a lot of money, and they're not going to be easy to
get rid of when the time comes...’As the only girl in my
generation, I always felt very conflicted when I heard things like
this.
5. I used to know an online friend of mine. She was three years
older than me and was born in 2000. When she was 18, she became
pregnant accidentally. With the advice of her family, she gave
birth to her first child.Her husband and she were planning to have
a second child, but during childbirth, for some reason, the
foetusunfortunately died and was unable to come into the world.She
once told me online that if she were a university student, she
probably would have chosen not to have children.I lost contact
with her later, and she stopped being active on social media, but
the emotions in the words she said to me have stayed with me until
now. The pain of giving birth twice and the regret of leaving
social life early cannot be made up for, but in fact countless
young girls have taken this path for various reasons.
6. When I was a child, the older girl in my neighborhood had a
particularly large scar on her arm. I heard from the adults in the
family that she had been too naughty as a child and had been
scalded by hot water. Perhaps because of this scar, she had very
few friends, but she was also very strong and often had a lot of
fun playing alone.One day, she was spending time outside by
herself as usual when an unfamiliar mother came by with her
daughter. As they passed her, the mother whispered, ‘See, you must
listen to adults, or else one day something will happen and you'll
get such an ugly scar that you won't be able to get married...’I
don't know if she heard the hurtful words, but I saw her run back
home immediately